My Love

How can I imagine? A sweet laughter shared between us. A smile playing on our lips, a sparkle in our eyes. This beautiful moment is so close. I can feel it. It's coming near, I just have to make it happen. I can't be vulnerable anymore, I can't only float down the river, I have to swim to shore. I have to swim to that grassy paradise and be with him. Finally, it's in view. Comfort fills me and I close my smiling eyes. Visions so sweet dance behind my eyelids. Visions of a beautiful future, filled with love and possibilities. A future I will make happen. It's my own heaven, my secluded paradise. His voice is the most beautiful song imaginable. Lulling and filled with excitement. Comedy-filled or somber, hearing it brings me to my perfect medium. Seeing his handsome face makes me smile, I imagine kissing his smiling lips. (A smile playing on our lips, a sparkle in our eyes.) In my mind I poke his perfect nose and he laughs. He is, no doubt, my angel. My savior, my love.

Be My Angel

Hollowed, Alone, and Broken. I need an angel. So desperately I pray to the goddess for one, so I can forget the heartthrob of mine. No, not forget, just... so I can remove the thorn. The scar will always be there, for better or worse, but I pray the thorn will leave. I figure that if I can somehow, someway, find an angel, someone so perfect, that I will be able to live through the denial of the bitter-sweet love of a real angel. Though an angel no doubt, he's stranger to me. Mother always warned to never take candy from strangers. I will neither feel his gentle arms nor taste his lovely kiss. Tears stain my cheeks and I drop to my bed, I cannot stand this, where is my Prince Charming, riding along on his majestic mount to save me from the vicious dragon that is my pain? As I fall I see red confetti all around me, my hair dances above my face. My lips part ever so slightly and I feel like I am in water, being rocked by the gentlest of waves. Angel, I think loudly, offer me your hand, please, I'm falling. It's blood I see, I'm falling! Please, offer me your hand! Save me, only you can! But, there is no angel, there is no savior, only me, in a pool of blood - my own blood - and I can feel no more. I no longer only feel gutted, I am. My hands clench the blade in my abdomen and tear it out, allowing a rush of fresh blood to warm my skin. When I wipe the blade clean I see a name, his name. I can't take it. Next thing I know the blade is flying across the room, spinning in air, towards him. No, my mind whispers, when did he get here? No! No, no, no! The blade lands in his chest, then goes through as he turns to vapor and disappears. I hear a dull thump as the blade sticks itself into the wall and I begin to bawl. He wasn't here. He'll never be here. I lay back down and gently clasp my hands over a white lily on my chest. Angel, time to wake this young girl with a gentle kiss. My eye's wont part until that day comes.
Angel, oh Angel, please. Please be my angel.